Sunday 21 June 2015

Father's day

I did not know it was father's day until I went to church and it was announced. As tradition has it in our church in such a day the leader of the service requests us to text our fathers and wish them a happy fathers day. It sounds like a simple activity to just text but it was hard for me to write the words she said. To me they were not just mere words but words that should come from the heart.
All this got me thinking of this whole father affairs in this 21 st century. Approximately 85% of the people I have interacted with in my life always have this father issues. Be it absent fathers,abusive fathers,passive fathers among others and it causes a lot of sorrow in my heart.
I cannot stop wondering what actually happened to taking responsibility,parenting among other virtues.
The question is where have we gone wrong? Who is to blame for this menace?Bishop TD Jakes once preached a sermon about fathers and he pointed out that,majority of the convicts he has talked to always have issues with their fathers.
It gets me thinking the more this continues,the more irresponsible father we are breeding. The more the irresponsible fathers the more emotionally damaged the children get.
My solution in all this is,it starts with the individual. You are the emotionally damaged child make the decision to be different,to raise your kids different.
It for the guys who have not yet become fathers to purpose in their hearts to be different. To be present,to be there for his child,to help them through life.
I have met guys who have been brought up by absent fathers and they decide to be different in future. To bring up their children in a whole different way than that of their absent fathers. It takes such people to change and annihilate this menace.
Absent and passive fathers have lead to a generation of women that are overly independent, in that they believe they do not need men. Perception of men has been tainted by the fathers that have brought us up. It has lead to a lot of damage especially emotionally to a great deal of people either directly and indirectly.
From another angle if you check out the social media on mothers day, everyone single person is celebrating their mothers. Ironically on fathers day they are few that celebrate their fathers even using their fathers pictures as their profile pictures.
It tells a lot about the perception that  we have held about our fathers. And I would say am no exception for it weren't for this church service I would not have sent that text to my father.
Thus it all starts we each one of us taking up the responsibility to change this situation.